Techno Viking

I remember sharing the Techno Viking video with a co-worker back in 2007 when it went viral.  We worked a job that had a whole lot of down time and we'd message humorous internet links back-and-forth to pass the time.  I honestly don't recall if back then we talked about videos being "viral" material, but there was definitely a sense that Techno Viking belonged on a short list of epic internet videos.

Other than what transpired on the 4-minute video, nothing more ever really came of the Techno Viking.  Usually there'll be interviews of viral video stars as they're stretching out their 15-minutes of fame.  Typically they give their account or some additional context as to what was going on in the video.  We get closure and move on to the next viral video.  To my knowledge no one ever tracked down Techno Viking.  I guess it helped that the video caught fire some seven years after it was filmed during the 2000 German "Fuck Parade".

It turns out that the Techno Viking prefers to stay anonymous.  So much so that he sued the original uploader of the video for the unauthorized profit he made off of his image... but somehow remained to still stay anonymous.  

Some some reason I had a random memory recall of this video.  Maybe something else pinged my brain that triggered the mythical dancing Viking-looking man to come back to the top of mind?  Either way, an idea for a custom parody card was subsequently birthed.

The idea was to make a football card where the Minnesota Vikings team name was played upon.  Kind of like was done with the Rangers on this card, and the Giants on this one.  I considered a couple of templates but I landed on the old trusty 1987 Topps football inspired design.  Basically, I just thought that the way that the Vikings team name was displayed would end up working better than some of the other '80s templates I was considering.  

Commemorative Thanksgiving Custom Cards

Last year when I made this commemorative Halloween 1984 card I wanted to follow it up with a Thanksgiving card, but I guess I ran out of time.

The Dutch Dooley card is the card I had in mind.  It's a hockey card playing on the scene where Ed O'Neill brings Ethan Embry out of his boarding school gagged and bound to a hockey stock.  

My only intention was to make the Dutch card.  But, it didn't feel right to stop there.  You see our family's tradition is to watch BOTH Dutch and Planes, Trains And Automobiles on Thanksgiving.  Put it this way, if I don't watch them both might as well not even have the turkey.  It would be like leaving the house with one shoe on, it just wouldn't feel right.

I year matched both movies with the card designs.  So, Dutch in 1991-92 Upper Deck hockey inspired frame (a PCb. first) and PT&A in a 1987 Topps inspired design.

My goal with the Planes, Trains card was a design where I could put both Del and Neal on the same card.  So for them I went with the league leaders design that I also used for the Over the Top card.  They're both deserving of their own cards but I wanted to keep it to two commemorative Thanksgiving cards total.  Plains, Trains is actually deserving of it's own custom set and PCb. could use more John Candy representation.  Maybe a future project?

The G.O.A.T.

In terms of internet timing, I'm way late on this card, but I had a few other things to get done before I was able to complete this one.  

I've been a fan of Tom Brady since his days at the University of Michigan.  I remember complaining about him having to split time with Drew Henson.  I thought Brady was the better of the two quarterbacks, but Henson was hyped to the moon, and unfortunately for U of M, he didn't quite pan out- opting to pursue baseball.  This was back when being a Michigan fan wasn't something shameful.

When Drew Bledsoe got injured and Tom took over at QB for New England it was perfect timing for me as my disgust for the Detroit Lions organization had peaked and I was ready to swear off any allegiance for good.  I'm not claiming I thought Tom Brady would turn out to be the greatest of all time, or even good for that matter, but it gave me a reason to be hopeful, which I hadn't had for a few years to that point following Barry Sanders' abrupt retirement.  Lo and behold Tom led the Pats to the Super Bowl that very season and eight more times in New England.  As a fan I'd say I hit the jackpot.

When Tom signed with the Buccaneers in the offseason I hoped he'd do well but I didn't think he, at 43, would be leading them to the big one.  I expected they would be a respectable football team.  I wanted those who claimed Brady was a "system quarterback" to shut their big yappers.  But, I cannot claim I expected a Super Bowl birth.  

On top of everything else the Bucs were the first team to play on their home field in a Super Bowl!  That's something, looking back, I'm really glad that happened as it was definitely an edge for the Bucs.  The only downside to rooting for Brady and the Pats is they never won in the trouncing fashion as these Bucs did over K.C.  Every Super Bowl win was a down-to-the-wire nail biting affair.  I hated that stomach-in-knots, not over over until the final play type of game.  I guess it would be great if there wasn't the vested interest, but I wasn't a casual fan.  I was always all-in.

Maybe just as satisfying as Tom getting his SEVENTH Super Bowl ring was him being completely sloshed during the victory parade.  That's a side of Tom Brady that has never been seen before.  A large part of his greatness comes from his 365 day discipline to his regimen.  So, to see him let up a bit and show that, as most were saying, he's "human" after all was pretty cool.

If you've made it this far than you get I'm a Tom Brady fan.  But, I've never even considered making a Tom Brady card to this point.  It wouldn't really fit with the cards I make just to do a straight forward football card.  There's plenty of Tom Brady cards out there so I wouldn't, in my mind, be adding something for a collector.  Although the designs I use are mostly sports card designs, the overwhelming majority of cards I've done with actual professional athletes have a tinge of humor to them.  Tom Brady being so drunk he needed assistance walking in a straight line provided the perfect tinge to add a PCb. card of The G.O.A.T. to the universe. 

'87 Topps

I think it's easy to see I have an affinity for card designs from the heart of the junk wax era, the 1980s.  I started shuffling in my mind how this Tom Brady card would look inside of the various football sets that Topps put out in the '80s.  I chose to go with a design inspired by Topps' 1987 design.  For whatever reason I think it's my favorite football design from the '80s, plus it's significant since Tom has been in the league for practically that long.  I was eager to use the colors from the Buccaneers creamsicle days.  Even though those teams pretty much all sucked, I loved those uniforms.  Red and orange are actually two of my favorite colors.

In the area where Topps would designate a player as a "Topps All Pro" I took the opportunity to give Brady a G.O.A.T. call out.  The Super Bowl MVP highlight in the lower right is just something I was playing around with that I thought looked cool so I went with it.  Trophies on cards have always been big for me since the days of getting excited over the "All-Star Rookie" trophy on Topps baseball cards.

I wanted to make the back have more of a special tribute card feel rather than a statistical style back look.  I recycled the back I created for the Over The Top card.  My other cards all get print runs of 50 where as this one is limited to only 12 in tribute to Brady and I wanted to hopefully be out of this card before the hype of the next NFL season sets in.

 

Over The Top

It seems like I do not go all that long before making another Sylvester Stallone card.  If it isn't obvious, he's definitely a favorite of mine.  Over the Top is one that's been on my radar for a little while but I couldn't figure out how I wanted to play it.  That changed upon running across a 1987 Topps football season leader card.

1987 Topps football

When the movie gets to the tournament there's an interesting cast of characters, almost like an 80's pro wrestling roster.  I thought about doing a mini-set like I did for Bloodsport and trying to get each of those a guys a card but ultimately I thought I'd be better served to put my energy into making one really cool card of Lincoln Hawk and Bull Hurley.  Plus, I really dig making cards with multiple persons on them. 

I rewatched the movie, specifically the arm wrestling tournament portion, a number of times so I could really solidify the card's back.  A lot of the same verbiage and details from the movie made it onto the card back.  I numbered the card 213 as an Easter egg to Over the Top's February 13, 1987 release date.

On a side note, this movie has a really cool soundtrack.  Does anyone know how Kenny Loggins is not the richest man in the music industry off of residuals alone? 

Kiss My Balls!

Unless this is your first time on this blog you the reader have come to know that I may have a thing for ‘80s nostalgia, yes? Since the invent of this thing we’ve come to know as the Internet I, as often as the opportunity presents itself, immerse myself in all things ‘80s that the Web has to show me. Now I’m not claiming to be an ‘80s historian but I know a thing or two. With that being said, how the hell am I just finding out that Jean-Claude Van freaking Damme was the original "Predator"!? Before being replaced because "The Muscles From Brussels" wouldn’t acquiesce to producer Joel Silver’s insistence that the hunter from an alien planet was not a kickboxer!? Why isn’t that as common of knowledge as Arnie not being able to properly pronounce "chopper"? Shouldn’t you go to say to a buddy “you know in Predator…” before being abruptly stopped with “yeah, Jean-Claude Van Damme was original "Predator", who doesn’t know that?” Well, I’ll tell you who didn’t - ME!

Here’s an absolutely epic recollection from Predator’s visual effects supervisor Joel Hynek of how JCVD was fired: 

“I was in Joel Silver's trailer, and he had called for Jean-Claude to come see him. And he comes in the trailer and Joel starts saying, 'You gotta stop kickboxing!' --- because [Jean-Claude] wanted to kickbox --- and he was telling him, 'Look, the Predator is not a kickboxer.' And Van Damme was like (Van Damme voice), 'I must do that; that's how I see the Predator.' And Joel said, 'Well, you're fired. Get out of here.' And Van Damme says, "Kiss my balls!" and walks out, and that was the end of that.”

Ho-ly hell, that is the greatest thing ever. “Kiss my balls”!? Bold move for a young unknown in Hollywood looking to become a star, eh? I’ve read reports where Van Damme was basically trying to position the “Predator” to have a mixed martial arts showdown with Arnold Schwarzenegger’s “Dutch” character. He envisioned this alien hunter character karate kicking his prey! This is just me freestyling a bit, but I have to imagine if they would have let the kicks slide it would have opened door to the “Predator” doing Jean-Claude’s signature nuts-to-the-ground splits. That would have been both ridiculous and awesome.

I’ve also read other things that say that even beyond Van Damme trying to turn the “Predator” into a Ninja Turtle the powers that be just weren’t happy with him as the alien, and neither was he. Jean-Claude hated the “Predator” suit and he let that be known. The suit itself was redesigned for the more imposing 7’3” Kevin Peter Hall who ended up in the role after Van Damme. As you can see from the card the original suit had more of a praying mantis looking head. By the way, the suit is red so they can do the CG camouflage stuff with it in post production in case you were wondering.

He looks fucking miserable

I think we can all agree that looking back everything turned out just fine for all parties involved. Even me, because I got to add Van Damme’s “Predator” to my Predator set.

I was actually done with this set when I found out about this little piece of Earth shattering lore, but I gladly went back and fashioned a late addition. This Predator mini-set, done in a 1987 Topps football inspired design, started with three cards “Blain”, “Mac” and “Predator” knowing that there was a good chance that I’d be able to get autographs through the mail from Jesse Ventura, Bill Duke, and Peter Cullen (uncredited "Predator" voice) respectively which can all be seen here in all their autographed glory. As the story has gone in my recent posts I’ve been adding additional cards to single cards I’ve already created to make what I’m calling “mini-sets” which brings us to this 10 card mini-set. One thing that I’d note with this mini-set is that I added a few humorous touches to some of the cards to have fun with them and round the edges a bit on an otherwise serious kick-ass action movie. If you’d like your own set (not a balls pun, I promise) you can pick them up in the PCb card shop.

Predator Turns 30

One of the greatest action movies of all time was released on this day in  1987.  So, in honor of this I'm sharing this picture of my 3 Predator cards I was lucky enough to get autographs on from Jesse Ventura, Bill Duke, and Peter Cullen.

Now I think I'll go Watch Predator ... on VHS of course.

I Still Believe!

I think anyone who loves the movie The Lost Boys has an affinity for Tim Cappello, or as my friends and I used to refer to him "the greased-up buff sax player".  We weren't the only ones either; here's a direct quote from his Wiki page: "He is notable for his muscular physique, his sexually provocative movements during his performances and for his tendency to perform shirtless, with his skin oiled and with his hair in a ponytail".

New phone, who dis?

Some vintage card designs I merely mask out the middle, while others I rebuild from the bottom up. This set is the latter.  Like the Predator card I did I chose to go with the movie font as opposed to trying to match the originals font.  I also included the "I Still Believe!" quote because otherwise what's the point?

I Ain't Got Time To Bleed!

Some really cool movies came out in 1987, but Predator may be the coolest.  Former MN Governor Jesse "The Body" Ventura is 1B to future "Governator" Arnold Swarzenegger's 1A when it comes to badassery in this movie.  Arny gets the A designation because he manager ice that "ugly motherfucker" of an alien Predator, but, other than that, they're neck-and-neck in my opinion.

This card is designed after the 1987 Topps football set.  I originally set out to model it after the baseball set from '87 but that damn wood grain gave my no formal photoshop training ass fits.  In retrospect I'm glad it did because I love the way this template looks.  Usually I try to get a close match to the original card's font, but in this case I went with the movie's font and I like the way that came together.  In the space designated for "Topps All Pro" I decided to give "Blain" credit for being a "sexual tyrannosaurus".  Then, I could not have asked for a more fitting photo with a fresh explosion in the background and Sergeant Blain Cooper pressing forward wielding his M134 Minigun with a cheek full of sexual tyrannosaurus fuel.